Derelict Junction

Providing missile launch codes for foreign cryptographers everywhere.

Thursday, November 04, 2004

Way to ruin everything.

The Red Sox, Halloween, traveling, seeing old friends, downing champagne. Boy, did that all that fun end abruptly. Thanks for nothing, Red State America! Get your "Gimme Red 'til I'm Dead!" T-Shirts at the inaguration.

What was the difference? In a word, Terrorism. It's hard to argue that 9/11 has not been the best thing to happen to the Bush Administration in the last 4 years. I have no doubt they would have found a way to invade Iraq without it, but this election came down to fear of Terrorism, no doubt. How else would you explain life-long Democrats like Ed Koch and the bulk of retired Northeasterers in Florida voting for Bush? Koch said on the Daily Show that he doesn't agree with Bush on a single domestic issue, yet the War on Terror trumped all those other issues.

While watching the election, late into the night, a cry came out from the street that was lifted right from my inner thoughts. It simply said, "Fuck Ohio!" over and over again. True enough. After all, that state lost 300,000 jobs during the Bush years, which usually would send one running for the challenger.

Still, I gotta put a lot of this back onto Florida again. Kerry was leading in the polls there 2 days before the election, but when it all came down to it, those geriatric douchebags went with the guy who's more likely to defend themselves from an attack that will never effect them. I guess it's true what they say in the Intensive Care Unit, "Everyday's a Gift." So if you're rapidly approaching a dirt nap in Tallahasee, you go with the guy who'll fend off the brown people so you can watch Matlock in peace.

And, yes, let's not forget the youth vote. Even your overrated icon Eminem urged you to get out there and ya still sat on your ass like there was a 24 hour Real World marathon going on. I have to agree with Andrew, and hope there is a draft, that'll get you out to the polls next time. I'm willing to bet the bulk of soldiers returning from Iraq voted. Also, don't forget next season's CNN Fall line up, including The War in Iran, which is only the popular lead-in to The War in Syria. Hell, you might make it onto Military Fear Factor after all. Consolation prizes include, Post-Tramatic Stress Syndrome, Flashbacks while teenagers laugh at you, and (the very popular) your arm, or leg. And if you manage to make it out of that, guess what? Trillions of dollars of deficits! There's no money left! There go the V-A benefits. Hope ya like camping, 'cuz you'll be doing it on the streets. -All because you were too busy waiting to tape that Good Charlotte video.

Again, thank you Red State America, you've assured the next generation of Bin Ladens will grow up to destroy some worthy State-side target, all of which are conveniently located in the Blue States. If I had ten minutes with a terrorist, I'd give him the entire NASCAR schedule. Posted by Hello



At 9:36 AM, Blogger Drew said...

Unlike a sports event that you can write off to 'bad luck' or whatever, this was a conscious choice that people made, and that makes it an even more bitter pill to swallow. And as much as I hate Yankee fans, the republicans that I have dealt with are much much worse. Generally speaking, they're completely selfish, completely uninformed and, unless, they're racist rednecks, usually sell something for a living.

What's also truly shitty is that the next four years are a complete no-win scenario. If we don't get attacked, then everyone will think Bush is doing his job, and if we are attacked, those same people will thank God we have someone in the white house taking 'the offensive'.

Given that Bush and his cronies are already touting this as a 'massive mandate from the masses' to go out and fuck up the world, it's going to be a long four years (eight if you assume that Jeb Bush will take over in 2008. Oooh, now that's pessimism).

At 4:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ya know, I think we can probably blame this election on some red sox fan somewhere, possibly curt schilling, but more likely some drunken underwear salesman or retired postal worker from Worcester. I'm assuming this person sold his or her soul for a red sox victory and the devil, being the crafty old goat that he is, allowed said person to exchange his lost soul for four more years of the Bush-avellian regime. Red states, hunh?

At 9:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just come to terms with it man, Kerry's a fucking HOMO. He's a flip flopping liberal ass pussy who wanted to tax the SHIT out of us. Speaking as a WHITE, THIRTY-SOMETHING, CATHOLIC, who makes some pretty good dough, FUCK THE POOR, FUCK THE MIDDLE EAST, and FUCK THE HOMOS. The country has spoken. Now deal with it.

At 11:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ah yes, the voice of enlightened reason. What a douchebag.


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